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La Jetée is by far the most critically and academically celebrated film on the list so far. It’s a 1963 French film, made up almost entirely of still images (there is only one brief moment of motion in the film).

While many details were changed, the general premise is the basis for 12 Monkeys, another classic post-apocalypse film which is only left off this list because I’ve seen it several times and, with a few exceptions, I wanted to focus more on movies I hadn’t seen before.

La Jetée is about a boy who has the image of a woman’s face burned into his memory as a child without understanding why. His memory of this woman comes just before WWIII ends life as we know it. Much later, he is kept in an underground prison beneath the ruins of Paris as an adult. It is there that he is used in time travel experiments, because they need guinea pigs with strong images connecting them to moments in the past.The experiment successfully projects his consciousness into the past in physical form, allowing him to meet the woman whose face he carried with him through the horros of the apocalypse.

The short film is only 28 minutes long, so I can’t really go into more detail than that without giving away the whole thing, but if you’ve seen 12 Monkeys, **spoilers ahead, skip to the next paragraph if you haven’t seen either of the films mentioned in this post.** the two stories, along with the shared theme of post-apocalyptic time-travel, are both rooted in the idea of a young boy witnessing his own death, unbeknownst to him that this is what he has seen.

This film was so delightfully unique. Perhaps the series of still images with narration would have grown tiresome over a feature length film, but for half an hour it never bogged down or lost emotional depth. It was almost like a graphic novel, with photographs instead of hand-drawn art, and no dialogue. It was also a slightly different motivation for time travel than I’ve seen in a story before. The film was ambitious enough that, while it was well-received and influential, it hasn’t been truly imitated stylistically on a large scale.

Most of all, I appreciated the subtly with which it grappled with huge ideas, some philosophical, and some fantastical in nature.

This is going to sound pretentious, but I mean it as an honest to goodness word of advice: if you need things more traditional and “mainstream” (for lack of a better word), it might be out of your strike zone. Otherwise, I recommend firing up the old Netflix ‘Watch Instantly’ feature to check it out.

Escape from New York is different than all the other movies so far. It’s unique in that the apocalypse isn’t worldwide. It’s only in New York, which from the perspective of 1981, when the film was made, is a pretty fair assumption.

As the story goes, in 1988, crime rises in the US by 400 percent. So, in response, they build a big wall around all of Manhattan and turn it into a super maximum security prison where criminals are sentenced for life. There are no guards inside, they just send you in and you’re on your own. It’s the perfect cocktail for all sorts of crazy-ass gangs and criminal bedlam.

In the distant future year of 1997, Airforce One is hijacked by crazy communist Americans (because Hollywood isn’t very good at imagining new bad guys), and it crashes inside Manhattan. The president is needed alive, because he was on his way to a summit in Hartford seeking peace with China and the USSR (who, apparently, have made up post-Omega Man, and have rekindled their war with America, resulting in WWIII).

The NYPD, who by ’97 is an army camped around the walls of the prison, has no choice but to send in the newest incoming inmate, former special forces super soldier and convicted bank robber, Snake Pliskin (overacted by Mr. Kurt Russell). He has to save the President of the ole’ US of A. Oh yeah, as well as a cassette tape that apparently has a bunch of important information on nuclear fusion on it… oh, the 80’s. If he fails, they’ll detonate charges they implanted in his neck and kill him instantly.

All sorts of crazy tomfoolery ensues. Pliskin, while great pains are taken to show us he’s a bad-ass, never feels organized or skilled enough to be a super-soldier. The movie is fun on a campy early-80’s level. No part of it is believable, or even makes much sense, but it definitely does have some things going for it, for example: Ernest Borgnine as a cabbie who, for some inexplicable reason, stayed behind to keep driving his cab when they walled off the city; Lee Van Cleef, as the head of the NYPD, who, for some inexplicable reason, is wearing a gold hoop earring; and Isaac Hayes as the self-appointed Duke of New York, who, for some inexplicable reason, doesn’t sing once.

If all you expect is stupid, absurdly campy, 1980’s dystopian “action,” it’s a moderately enjoyable hour and a half to spend watching a movie which has been influential in several genres.

Australia has already made several appearances in these post-apocalypse movies. With The Quiet Earth, it was New Zealand’s turn. All I knew about this one going in was that it was a post-apocalypse film, that it was on lots of the lists I found, and that since it was called The Quiet Earth, it was most probably a ‘last man on earth’ sort of movie. I don’t want to ruin anything, because I really appreciated going in blind. I’ll keep the details sparse.

I could be wrong about this, I didn’t check at all, but I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a Kiwi movie. Sure, movies filmed in New Zealand like Lord of the Rings, but not a truly Kiwi film. The Quiet Earth was made by New Zealanders, based on a novel by a New Zealander, and set in New Zealand. If I were going to be small-minded and base my entire opinion of New Zealand on this movie, I would surmise that the people of New Zealand are trippy as shit. Now, obviously, I don’t actually base my assumptions about New Zealand on The Quiet Earth, I base them on The Flight of the Conchords.

The first portion of the film, which is just Bruno Lawrence as the main character trying to make sense of the empty world he finds himself in, is the best part of the film. I was really drawn in by how well they tackled that familiar part of the genre. The increase of tension was really well proportioned to the slow revelation of small details about what the hell was going on.

As I’ve already implied, this movie had several key moments that were mind-bending, including the conclusion. Director Geoff Murphy won’t even officially say what the film’s ending means.

The film had so many strengths that I wished I’d enjoyed it more than I did. Sadly, the relationships between characters, as well as the motivations for people doing what they did, was weak, even nonexistent. Maybe it was better in the novel, but in the film it was like: ‘Hey, I’ve got this really great sci-fi idea for an end of the world movie. Oh, wait, I forgot to include actual characters… give me an hour to let me throw some people in this bitch and we’ll get this show on the road.’

Anyway, Bruno was great, the film had tons of really great things going for it. Yet, the weakness of the third act makes me sadly admit that, in my humble opinion, The Quiet Earth was good, but not great.

Hey folks, I just wanted to share with you that February 2011 was our biggest month ever in traffic. Woot.

Thanks for visiting. I can’t speak for our contributors, but I would do this if no one read it. Yet, it’s so much more fun sharing it with others. It reminds me of the old Celtic proverb: “The readers of Roused to Mediocrity are the smartest, prettiest, most amazing human beings in the history of the universe.” And, how!

This movie was definitely guilty of all sorts of 70’s sci-fi shortcomings: cheesy, dated special effects; silly miniatures attempting to pass as a futuristic dome city; gaps in reason in important portions of the film; and outfits for women which literally left nothing to the imagination, while men’s garments were comparably normal.

Yet, for all the silliness, I actually really enjoyed this movie.

There was a level of ambition in the story they were trying to tell that I appreciated. The film is very loosely based on a novel. I assume, at the very least, the book probably goes into more detail imagining what could happen as populations continue to rise, and resources continue to dwindle. Add to that the quickly growing portion of the world’s population which is made up of young people, to the extent that a huge percentage are under the age of 30. What if said young people killed off all the people over 30 to conserve resources? It’s not exactly a premise that stacks up with the likes of brilliance such as 1984 or Fahrenheit 451. Still, at the very least Logan’s Run functions well as a guilty pleasure film, and for all its absurdity, it’s actually a fairly well made movie for pre-Star Wars 1970’s sci-fi standards.

While I poke fun at the premise, and I don’t see the world being run successfully by 20somethings anytime soon, the central message beneath the surface of the film really jives with me. While it is almost buried under all the silliness, it does shine through as the strongest part of the storytelling; that point being that an entire society can function based on a carrot that was never actually dangling from the end of our proverbial stick. False hope, combined with hedonistic comfort, can combine to get people to go along with all sorts of bullshit they should see through from a mile away. I wouldn’t show the film in a class to illustrate this point, but I still appreciated it. While the film may not have aged very well in so many ways, that point has more to say to our current society than ever.

Aside from that primary nugget, I’d probably list three things as my favorite parts of the movie. One: the hilariously crazy, sweet old man they meet in the ruins of Washington, DC. He lives with a bunch of cats and makes up poems about them. He’s awesome. Two: watching the beautiful Jenny Agutter on screen for two hours. Three: imagining Michael York’s appearances playing himself on Curb Your Enthusiasm throughout the entire film. I can’t tell if the guy’s delivery is brilliant or hilarious, but it kept me watching just the same.

The parts that invoked the most unintentional humor were: anything involving gun-play, which was absurd on every possible level; any and all explosions; and the android who was really a guy in a mask… a mask with a big hole at the mouth… through which you could see the actors lips and teeth.

This is one of those rare times where a dated film becomes the perfect storm. It’s a cocktail of just the right amounts of well executed filmmaking, unintentionally hilarious lameness, and an intelligently conceived point about culture. The result is a fun experience, and probably the lightest time I’ll spend in a post-apocalyptic dystopia during this exercise in ambitiously pointless movie watching glory.

If The Omega Man was the worst of what poorly aging sci-fi can be, Logan’s Run is the best.

The Omega Man, Charlton Heston in a film based on the novel I Am Legend. Yes, the same I Am Legend which was adapted into the Will Smith movie (it was also previously adapted into a movie called The Last Man on Earth, starring Vincent Price).

This movie was… well… weak. There are quite a few spoilers here, because I have no qualms about ruining this movie for anyone. Read on at your own risk.

Let’s see, where to begin. Well, for one, the USA wasn’t in any way responsible for the in-film catastrophe that wiped out human existence as we know it. It was, for some inexplicable reason, the Soviet Union fighting against the People’s Republic of China. The movie came out in 1971, and with all of the terrifyingly likely scenarios for humans to attack one another with germ warfare in the early 70’s, they come up with an absurdly unlikely one, just to absolve poor little America of any shred of guilt. WTF?

Anyway, the germ warfare impacts the US, and kills almost the entire population. Everyone else is turned into a bunch of pale assholes who burn shit all the time. Why did everyone who didn’t die turn into a bunch of pale assholes? Meh, that’s never really explained, the plague just did that. It’s just the way things go in a world where Communists abandon thier war against the free market to wage an inexplicable war against each other.

Robert Neville is alone as an uninfected man living in Los Angeles. He’s a doctor who was able to inoculate himself just in time to save his own life. The pale assholes, who are also a cult known as “The Family,” REALLY hate Neville. They keep trying to kill him and/or burn his house down.

At one point, they catch him and try to burn him at Dodger Stadium, only to be thwarted when it turns out Neville isn’t the last living non-asshole around. Well, actually Neville is kind of an asshole too. So, it turns out he isn’t the only non-pale living person in LA. I like Dodger Stadium, so, it had that going for it.

Heston has to do an awful lot of acting on his own, carrying whole scenes with no supporting cast, talking to himself as he attempts to retain his sanity. Will Smith had to do the same thing in I Am Legend, but Smith is a much more capable actor than Heston was. And, speaking of the Will Smith movie, it’s pretty fascinating reading the plots of the various versions on wikipedia. They are so loosely based on the original novel. Each film changes so much in the adaptation process, much more than normal.

The very worst part of the film was the atrocious Christ imagery that seemed to come out of nowhere at the end. He dies, because the leader of the pale assholes throws a spear from a two story window on the other side of the street and lands a perfect shot to our boy Neville. Neville survives the night and his new friends arrive in time to take a jar of his blood, which is the only cure for the plague, as Heston slumps down into a Christ pose and dies. I was literally unable to stop myself from audibly complaining, “Oh my God! You’ve got to be shitting me.”

Lazy writing, attempts at grandiosity that wind up absurd, confused attempts to make points about humanity; this movie is a cocktail of all the worst parts of bad science fiction.

Gift cards are awesome. Sales are also awesome. Combine them and they become something more wonderful than I can describe.

I had a $25 Amazon gift certificate still unused from Christmas. Then, Amazon emailed me to tell me that Inception was on Blu-Ray for only $13. I decided I needed to investigate this. What did I find? Not only was Inception on Blu-Ray for under $15, so was Toy Story 3.

That’s right folks, thanks to ye olde gift card, I am now the proud owner of Inception and Toy Story 3 for a grand total of $5.64. Boo-yah, Grandma.

Check ’em out, homeslices: Inception. – $13.99. — Toy Story 3 – $13.99.

Yup, that’s right, this entire post was an explainabrag.

Being definitively uncool and well past the age when wearing skateboarding shoes everywhere is acceptable, I feel like I’m beyond the ‘time to learn how to skateboard’ stage of my life. But seeing this video from Man About Town magazine of freestyle skateboarder Kilian Martin romping about on a board in dress shoes and a sweater gave me brief pause.
This shit is awesome.

Less awesome, of course, is the fact that YouTube won’t allow me to embed the video here. Oh well.

Going into this one, I didn’t expect much. All I knew was that Don Johnson was in it, that it was supposed to be weird as shit, and that the main character was able to speak to his dog psychically. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t expect much, because I got less.

It’s got a big cult following, and was on most post-apocalypse lists I found. I cannot be counted as one of the film’s fans.

The film was erratic and poorly executed in just about every possible facet. Primarily though, my issue is that this is the most openly sexist movie I’ve ever seen. It was genuinely absurd. Call me crazy, but I prefer heroes who don’t rape women because they have a belief that women are human beings, not because they never get around to it.

Not that having flawed main characters is something I’m against, it’s more the way the subject matter in the film was depicted. The whole, ‘Haha, isn’t rape hilarious? That rascally tramp! ‘ thing was just too much for me.

**Spoiler Alert** Then, in the “twist ending,” Don Johnson’s character kills the female lead so that his dog won’t starve to death. Haha, isn’t that hilarious? Women are just conniving and seductive objects created to satiate our various apetites.

Blech!

I assume that the content was treated with more nuance and irony in the book, but the film just didn’t get it done, so it came across as terribly sexist, uninspired, and boring.

Also, what was the deal with “The Underground?” A subterranean Topeka, Kansas where everyone wears clown make-up, there’s a 24-hour marching band, and even though there are no sun lamps present there are still trees and grass growing everywhere… what the fuck? Oh yeah, and when the security android is killing various teens for their treason, they just squat down and stare at him, waiting for him to come and kill them one at a time. Thus, even though said security android can only walk quickly and one could easily get away by running, the teens are all executed… one at a time… next to each other.

Sorry that the Day Six post went up for a moment, thus screwing up everyone who reads with an RSS feed. I’ve been giving myself a two day buffer to write the posts, and when I finished the writeup for today’s, I accidentally hit ‘Publish’ instead of ‘Schedule.’

By the way, how do you like the new layout? This one is still temporary, but I was really tired of the other one. Hooray for change!