awake my soul.

I’m not done with my master’s degree, but I’m also not in school right now. The reason is a long story, or maybe several short stories all wound up together in succession. Either way, my life is in a pretty odd place. I miss a lot about being in school. I like being in school in general, and I really enjoyed being at The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology in particular. What I miss most is absolutely the conversations that were so easy to come by in grad school. In class, after class, in discussion groups, just hanging out with other students… it was so common for things to evolve into conversations of deep things. It was good for my brain, and good for my soul.

Being in a place where the goal is to become more than we are, individually and collectively, is such a beautiful thing. The Seattle School is one of those places people go because they dream of making the world a better, more beautiful place. I come to realize more all the time that I am diminished by no longer being a part of that community.

This diminishment is my own fault. Leaving school there was always inevitable. Even if I had never decided to slow down, and then taken a leave of absence, eventually I would have graduated, so either way I was going to walk away eventually. I needed to maintain a connection with a community of people who desired stepping into deeper conversations of ultimate things. I didn’t do that, but now I desperately need it back.

I had already been thinking along these lines, and then I got together with my friend Naomi and our conversation ended up running the gamut of all sorts of awesome things. We talked about politics, art, race, her music (she’s a brilliant singer/songwriter), 30 Rock. It was good.

My brain has been sleeping. Something has changed in me, has turned off. Even with my close friends I’m less likely to share my opinion and thoughts, which is really weird. My friends are safe, they might tell me I’m fucking nuts if I say something they don’t like, but they’ll still love me afterward… at least I think they will.

I need more outlets and contexts for conversation and engagement. Once I get going, it’s what I’m best at. Does anyone have some they are already a part of? Or want to start some with me? Think tanks? Writing groups? Discussion groups? Book clubs? Movie watching clubs? Anything?!? I’m already a part of a context that is trying to do this, and I don’t mean to diminish that, but I need more.

Maybe you live in Seattle and are interested. Maybe you live somewhere else and we would need to get creative. I just know I need to exercise my brain, to be me again, to awaken my soul from its painful and distressing slumber.

Any takers? Anyone? Anyone?

2 Responses to “ awake my soul. ”

  1. A friend and I started a book club at the public library. We approached the library with the idea of having a book club once a month, open to everyone. We started in Feb and it has really been wonderful. Amy and I picked the first book but since then each month whoever is around the table suggests a book. I have really enjoyed it – I makes me “think”. I have read books I may not have read on my own. We have read “Their Eyes were watching God”, “The Awakening”, “Come to the Lighthouse” “the Book of Love”. This month we are reading “Housekeeping: A Novel” by Marilynn Robinson. Amy and I had no “agenda” going into this. We both enjoy reading and wanted to meet people. The library mentions the book club in their newsletter and we just show up and wait to see who comes. Amy and I figured the worst that happens is no but the two of us show up but each month we have met new people and some are now regulars.

  2. what about a live thread or skype or something for those who are not there, make it fun different times, subjects, sometimes open to all, sometimes a secret passwords and special invites something really out there, something with some subjects that would make for crazy at time subjects that are just fun. Some sessions would happen after a scavenger hunt for clues or something that would get your juices flowing and would work get some of your fellow comic book geeks searching and joining the threads. something that would lead up to meeting a comiccon next year. I know you have really good knowledge of technology that you could do it. I know you are very creative and can easily do it so you got any ideas